Haley’s blog

Ever wonder why people get angry? 

Sure on the surface there are lots of reasons, some which may be completely valid.  When you go beyond the surface however, to the core of why people get mad, it always comes down to the same thing.

People get angry because they're not getting their way and don't understand anger management tips.

Once you understand what you're mad at or why, you can begin to focus this angry energy in a good way. Accepting that you're angry, that you have a right to be angry, and then doing something about the problem or the situation would be your next step.

Creative visualization is another tool, a sort of art form in your mind, which you can use. You can pretend that you are a lion ripping up the person who hurt you, or you can imagine a cleansing fire burning away all the evil in a person and leaving behind only that which is good and worthy of remaining. Use your imagination and visualize symbolic scenes which will help you heal.

Some positive statements to repeat, in your mind, in those moments of anger: I refuse to allow this person to get under my skin. I can control my outburst. I accept this person idea. I accept this person. I will be in control of my emotions. Try thinking of other statements you can repeat the moment anger starts. Remember change your thoughts will change your feelings and result in change behavior.

Once you are angry, you have two choices: Defuse your anger or enflame it. The danger with enflaming your anger is that it quickly becomes a habit and you forget it's a choice.

Enflaming requires nurturing anger by running the injustice over and over in your mind. Another way to help someone with anger management is to tell as many people as you can about how you feel until you get a number of folks on your side. They become assistant enflamers. Blaming and enflaming fit dangerously well. The more you blame, the more enflamed you become. The more enflamed you become, the more you find to blame.

Just take it easy. This does not mean that you laugh off your anger, just take it nice and easy. Breathe and try to relax your whole body. Anger management is a matter of choice. In other words, you are the only person responsible if you will get angry or not. Take it nice and easy. It is much easier to think about the consequences from the possible actions you want to do while succumbing to your anger than thinking of what you have done wrong after you have calmed down.